This FanFiction episode contains STORMBLOOD SPOILERS.
I have also made one minor tweak, but nothing that deviates from the official storyline.
[Edit] Now I have only just completed Castrum Fluminis, it seems there is one detail I got wrong, but I'll adjust my wording to make it a memory lapse for the WoL.
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She should have killed him. He had it coming, he even goaded her to do it. But in that goading proved the reason for not doing it at that moment. Her willpower was hers to command, not his.
"Peace with the Empire? What genius tried to make that a selling point?" she growled from the safety of solitude in Kugane, "They are the ones seeking conquest, who infringe on other nations' land, they who cavort with the Ascians, blind to the fact it is them being manipulated. No, they don't want peace, it's a hideous ploy. And a totally obvious one, too."
"Everything you are - your power, even your face - it vexes me" he had snarled, so close to her face she swore she could smell arrogance on his breath.
"Okay, so my face doesn't vex me," she smirked, "But I'd give up the power, prestige, influence right now if it bought me a life of peace to enjoy at home, or in the fields, on my oblivious own."
His outburst had initially saddened her. Though the timing had come as a surprise, the event had not. It was all she could do to hide her tears from Yugiri and Hien in the warm feathers of her Chocobo. Once more the dragonet that followed her also gave what comfort he could.
But he had, deep down, angered her. But not for the reasons he would guess.
What made her angry is that he blamed her. Like she had had a choice in the matter. Swept along by allies presuming that their precious Warrior of Light would help them win the day, a strangely-absent sense of Hydaelyn, the beast tribes always requiring outside help to keep their own affairs in order - it was suffocating. But she couldn't get out.
"You want to talk about losing those precious to you, do you?" she said through bared, gritted teeth, "You have no idea how often that's happened to me. Even I don't know how many I've lost now."
The tears threatened her emerald-green eyes, but she held them back, unwilling to give in to another force she couldn't control.
She paced back and forth in the shadow of the Hostelry, her mind whirring. Asahi had been a disciple of Zeno's - was still for that matter. Disciples aim to follow in their master's footsteps, to equal if not exceed their lords. The two-faced git was nothing like Zenos. In Zenos, you knew you were facing a crazed monster who sought to mess with Primals, whose only power laid in the secrets and relics he stole from more worthy nations. It was blunt, one-dimensional even, but you knew what you were facing.
Asahi, now he was different. Insidious. Like poison laced with honey. It might seem good at first taste but revealed its true nature soon enough. He should be dead.
She smashed her fist against the wall, grateful she had made some metal-plated gloves solely for her private rages. The crunch and clang were satisfying, while not actually damaging her ability to hold weapons.
"He will die. If not by my hand, then by another. He only has to fail once and he might die at his superior's hand."
She paused for a moment to steady her breathing.
"His superior?", she whispered, rubbing her temples, "well, obviously the Emperor would be called 'master' and 'lord' by all, that goes without saying. But who else would he deign to call 'master'?"
Suddenly a memory from Ala Mhigo resurfaced. Something had vexed her at the time and she hadn't been able to put her finger on it.
Zenos had fallen to the ground, having cut his own throat. She saw him fall with petals descending as floral rain where they had battled. Yet, mere moments later, Zenos was not there. No one had discussed burying or cremating the body. Or in the least, she didn't remember that being discussed. Regardless, what she felt, she knew she was right.
"Now you see him, now you don't," she whispered.
With a gasp, she clasped her hand to her mouth at the gut-wrenching, soul-destroying realization. The Empire had played with magitek, Allagan relics and even imbued subjects with Aether. All that was only one step away from the unthinkable.
Yet as she thought about it, enemies deemed fallen were still alive. Yotsuyu survived a building falling on her. Fordola should, by rights, be dead - though on that score Ali was glad she wasn't.
They thought they had freed, liberated, released nations. Yet those who had conquered them were all still alive.
Yotsuyu was still alive.
Fordola was still alive.
"Now you see him, now you don't," she repeated
Zenos was still alive.
Or made alive once more. It didn't matter.
Which meant all the wars - other people's wars, were left devoid of victory. They were not truly free. She was not truly free. She had to meet with the Scions, or anyone else she currently saw as an ally. And it had to be in person, linkpearl would not be safe.
"Now you see him, now you don't," she muttered once more as she reached her hand to the nearby Aetheryte and vanished to once again be the bearer of bad news.
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Note: I've only just done Castrum Fluminis, which was a few days after writing this. I'm keeping it as-is, simply because the Echo vision of Asahi simply confirmed her suspicions, rather than being a "new" revelation. I just want to enjoy writing a few times in the year, rather than get too bogged down in details. Thanks!
- T'alitha
